vlogger

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the word "vlogger" makes me want to vlomit. It's like regular vomitting, but self-absorbed and recorded on video.

Kick Awesome

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My brother Ethan wants people to start using "Kick Awesome" as an adjective.

I wish I had a way to describe how great I think his idea is.

Freemium

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Oh good, they just invented a word that I can hate as much as I hate farmville.

I wish this word had a liver so I could punch it until it ruptures.

Gently Used

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It's used, but it has only been used gently. By a really creepy guy wearing rubber gloves.

a Poem

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Do you think me heretical
(because I over-use the parenthetical)?

I literally want to explain this to you.

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Grammaticians and Word folks get all bent up when someone says, "I literally died right there", or "I literally passed out from the shock". Because when you say "literally" you mean "it actually happened".

But here is the thing. I think it is perfectly within the American tradition to use hyperbole. I think that adding "literally" makes it's hyper-hyperbole (superbole?). I mean if you said, "I figuratively died right on the spot" it would kind of ruin the statement. Maybe I should start doing that. "I died right on the spot" is pure hyperbole, and I like it.

In any case, I am literally okay with it. I think it a bit clumsy, but I believe that most of the people who get upset at it's usage are the type of people who will tell you whether or not the pun was intended.

P.S. "hyperbole" is a FANTASTIC word.

It's not so bad.

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Even on your worse day, be glad that you don't have to use "frolf" in a sentence.

Ten-Dollar words

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One of the reasons why Brian Watkins is an excellent vocabulary ranger is that he introduced me to the term "Nefarious Prevaricators"

Sometimes ten dollar words are just so much fun to use. Some of my favorite words and phrases (and the people that use them):

Brian Watkins: Nefarious Prevaricators
Dad: Sesquipedalian Proclivities
        Blythe Insouciance
Uncle Lyman: Veritable Epicurean Delight

I love to use the word "exacerbate" even though it may sound a little BYP, though I think I have waited my whole life long just to use the word "perspicacity".

Punishment

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Probably the worst punishment of all is being "hoisted on your own petard",

at least phonetically speaking.

Fecund

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My high-school health teacher couldn't prounounce "feces", he pronounced it "FECK-ess" and I hate that almost as much as I hate "fecund".

I think calling your wife "fecund" will probably for sure ruin your marriage, even if it is true and desireable.

Promiloquent.

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Promiloquent

adjective describing people who are promiscuous with beautiful language, sharing with anyone, regardless of the audience.

you heard it here first. Yeah, I just invented that word, it can't be found anywhere on the Google.

NEW WORDS

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The world is still agog over my introduction of two words into the modern lexicon, namely:
Tomorning
And
Yesternight

Alert reader and Vocabulary Ranger Heidi Alder pointed out that the English language has some deficiencies when it comes to speaking about families. Specifically there is no gender-neutral plural for the children of your siblings. You must use niece(s) and nephews(s) depending on the assortment that you have. Heid suggests "nyphews" as plural. I tried niephews but it seemed overlong. What do you think of "neephs"?

I'm going to try it out. I suggest you do too.

Vestigial

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This word is as ugly as the organs that it describes.

I would like to say it is entirely useless, and a remnant from another era, if there were only a word to describe it...

Trickertreat

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it should be one word.

cowardly words

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Okay, so if you're going to say something is cowardly, try this great word:

craven.

But don't, under any circumstances, use the word pusillanimous. I don't feel the need to explain why.

Indefatigable!

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I never fatigue of this fantastic word.

Muy Bién

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I'll tell you what, the Mexicans sure got it right when they invented the word "Bueno", that is one bueno word to say.

bueno.

Learning about your body.

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I loved my college human anatomy class. There are some great sounding body parts that could also be lairs for evil villains

like the philtrum or the caruncula.

But there are some body parts that are so evil I shan't say their name in public.

( Uvula, I am looking at you, and don't even get me started on the word "nodule")

In other news, did you know that most amphibians have a nictating membrane? You didn't? that's because your biology teacher was too shy to say that word.

Also, remember when the rappers would say "Insane in the membrane, insane in the brain!"

Um, you know they are not the same thing, right?

Black Tie Occasions

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So on the plus side, you get to wear a tuxedo. But, I don't know if it is really worth it if you have to hear someone say "cummerbund"

I can't believe I just wrote that.

Angina

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Probably the worst thing about "Angina" is having a heart problem, but I am pretty sure what the second worst part is.

Some odd words

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If you are a vocabulary ranger, then you will appreciate this:

http://users.tinyonline.co.uk/gswithenbank/unuwords.htm

(via BoingBoing)

Going Anakin

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I'd like to introduce an new phrase into the American lexicon:

Going Anakin

When a show with a beloved and well-respected mythologies over-explains it in a cute, and unnecessarily detailed way (Like when a powerful and mystical force becomes simply the actions of midichlorians, and the darkest villainof all time(s) becomes pie-faced kid with a whiny voice).

Example: "Last weeks episode of LOST totally went Anakin with the light cave."

or

The last episode of Battlestar Galactica was awesome until it went Anakin in the last fifteen minutes.

Sometimes the mystery box needs to stay a mystery.

The Worst professional sports franchise

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Prolly the worst name for a professional sports franchise is The Nuggets.

Think about it

Nuggets

the nuggs

When I hear the word nugget I think of two type: Chicken and Butt

gold isn't even on the list.

so not cool

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the following term is not cool:

cool beans

If you say this phrase it is like putting dockers on your sentence and making it tuck in it's polo shirt.

so not cool

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wise words are often the simplest ones.

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“Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no exceptions to this rule.”

- Stephen King

Churro

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It is as fun to say as it is to eat.

wellness

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I was discussing with a friend which one was correct nutraceutical or neutracutical.

The answer is:

It doesn't matter, you should never write nor say that fell word. That word is a lie.

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Spork is a miserable word; just look at it.

This ain't no fashion blog

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You should never say (nor wear) the following (unless you like punches in the gut/face)

culotte

skorts

but I am not sure that either is any better that genocide. At least genocide isn't a horrible, horrible word.

The Great and Abominable word: Bloggernacle

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Phonetically speaking "bloggernacle" is one of the worst words of all times. I am embarassed to be in the same room with that word.

I think that its usage signals the end of time(s).

Apocalyptically speaking, I think that some other very embarrassing names would be "Gog" and "Magog". With a names like that, I think you would kind of have to grow up to become the AntiChrist. I bet their Mom dresses them in matching outfits too, with crocs.

Conglomerate

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this is the word they were looking for when they invented the word for phlegm.

Aluminum

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When the Brits say it, it sounds like an alloy on a spaceship.

Aluminium

I swear they sneak in an extra "i"

Awestralians (because they are awesome)

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I like the way Australians say "no", it sounds like "noy".

This makes me want to get lots of rejection from Australians.

Hey, wanna hear a joke about a Kangaroo?

Best Word in the English Language: Defenestrate

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If you don't like this word I might have to defenestrate you.

definition: throw through or out of the window; "The rebels stormed the palace and defenestrated the President"

words I don't "heart"

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okay, I don't get why people feel compelled to use the word "heart" as a verb. It doesn't sound cool. Trust me.

COMPOUND WORDS

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I dislike the following webinar, nettiquette, sexting, mompreneurs.

Please, stop squishing words together, we have plenty of good words.

Having a Hard Time Staying Gruntled

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Disgruntled

"ph" Words to Avoid Like the plague

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I try to avoid these ph words as much as possible, but sometimes you just can't avoid them. I really wish there were alternative words for each of them. But there just aren't. And I hate that.

pamphlet, amphitheater, camphor

Okay, I really never need to say the word "camphor." And there is one "ph" word that I can always avoid:

"phat"

I'm embarrassed to even type it. That's the only time I ever will.

Food words that make me lose my appetite

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You hear these all the time to describe food in commercials.

Decadent, dollop, succulent.

Oh, and the word “yummy” whenever it is used to describe anything other than food. And even then it is only okay for a baby to say it.

Hello Fellow Word Haters

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First of all, I need to clear something up. Damian, "doily" is mine. I claim that one. I've hated that word since before we started logging awful words during our freshman year in college. I believe that the d-word was my number one even back then.

Now that we have that out of the way, I'd like to introduce you all to a word that makes me shy anytime I hear it. Ready?

weep.

In every single context it is embarrassing. Seriously. Whether you are an eye, a wound or a willow, you should never, ever do it. And if you do, don't use that word to describe what you did.

that is all for now

deploy

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PAMPHLET

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I don't care, get another way to distribute your political ideas and or religious ideologies.

Call it a minibook or mega card. Just don't call it what people are calling it.

This word is barely worse than it's ugly friend "leaflet".

Either word deserves a punch in the throat.

PLENARY

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FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY DO NOT USE THIS WORD!!

MODICUM

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If used properly I don't hate this word, but out of context... Don't say it, don't whisper it, don't even think it. I will punch you with a handful of gravel.

Use some level of restraint when deciding whether or not to use this word. I don't know how much, just some amount that is not too much.

PROBATE

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My cousin Tom pointed this one out to me.

If there is one place that I don't want to end up it is probate. I mean if I hear this word by itself it's not that bad, but in mixed company it makes me blush. Please don't tell my mom that I have used this word before.

PENUMBRA

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Don't say this word to me. Not unless you want a face full of slap.

DOILY

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doily

I hate this word. I hate the look of it. Did you ever have that dream where you are in elementary school and you think everything is okay but then you realize that you are wearing extra-medium briefs and you can't pull your shirt down to cover them.

That is how I feel whenever this word is uttered even out of my ear shot.

Words I Hate/Love

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The sole purpose of this blog is to post words that I hate. Sometimes people will make comments to disagree, but they are wrong. This is my blog. If you are awesome and hate embarrassing words maybe I will invite you to contribute to the blog.

PS> we are not going to spend any time talking about the word "moist" I am SO over that discussion and you probably fall on the wrong side of it.